How to Learn the Local Language

Overcoming (or slowly climbing) the hurdle of chatting with your neighbors, ordering a meal, and dealing with bureaucracy in the local language

I want to wrap up this month on language learning to talk about how to actually achieve this pretty much always difficult challenge.

While I know most people look at learning the language in terms of the logistical benefits like going to the doctor, dealing with immigration, and making your first dreaded phone call, there’s a lot of emotional wins here, too.

I wrote about this briefly at the start of the month when I touched on if you really need to learn the language to live abroad, but just quickly so you’re nice and motivated before I dive into the goods, there’s a lot more to learning the language than just those transactional conversations.

Being able to order wine in Italian was a top priority

You’ll be able to chat with your neighbors or people you meet on the street. To this day I’m still more confident talking about Bandido, my dog, than myself due to how many people want to ask questions about him while we’re out on a walk. Italians are real pet-people and it’s been such a goal to not look dumbstruck when someone approaches me.

You’ll have a better understanding of the culture, helping you to assimilate. If you want to get out of the expat bubble and make this place feel like home, this will help leaps and bounds.

Your potential friend pool will grow. While you can rely on English and potentially your native language to find friends abroad, your options will greatly grow if you’re willing to do this in the local language. This is the final boss of the game and may take years of studying to accomplish but is possible. I actually don’t have any friends in Italy who’s native language is English - not even my husband. If all of them can do it, we certainly can too.

You’ll be able to actually experience the place. So many doors will open once the language barrier is removed - even if you can only speak like a 3 year old. You’ll be able to travel to lesser-known corners with confidence and have deeper conversations with strangers who otherwise could only give you a nod of the head.

Am I romanticizing it? I don’t think so. From all the places I’ve lived and comparing the times I have and have not learned the language, I truly believe it changes things for better.

Now, on to deal breaker: actually learning.

This is where things get real and not so fun.

I’m 6 weeks into my language class and every Monday and Wednesday I feel a little brain dead. Learning another language is exhausting. It turns your brain on overdrive and you usually can’t get a minute rest. Couple that with cultural differences and bedtime will never feel so nice.

Now that I’m in this once again, I remember feeling this exhaustion everyday in Ecuador, where I never spoke English, even after 2 years of living there. Yes, it lessened but as I was always working to improve, my brain never fully turned off.

So, there’s that to look forward to.

Your options to learn

Some people, like my annoying polyglot of a husband, can just learn? I’ll never understand that method so this is geared to those like me, who need a ridiculous level of motivation to get over the mental block.

Immersion

I’ve tried a lot of different ways to learn languages over the years and for me the easiest method is immersion. I need to live in the environment and feel like its either sink or swim to get my head in the game.

I can’t imagine there to be any better method than this, even for those who naturally learn languages easier.

Being surrounded in the language just helps. You hear it all day and you’re forced to speak it before you feel ready. Chances to practice reading are all around you on signs and menus. It helps your brain absorb things in a natural way.

Some people can get by on immersion alone but I do recommend combining it with some level of study to help get down the grammar.

Other than some basic classes in high school and university, I’ve learned all my Spanish through immersion. And even though I have a high level and can deal in all situations, I don’t sound…educated. Simple stuff sure, but certain tenses I always mess up on and honestly don’t even know how to fix it since I never fully learned the building blocks.

Since I don’t work in Spanish or even live in that language, I’m happy where I am. It works to chat with my in-laws and in our Spanglish household but I would want to polish the rough edges if I needed to use it more.

Language Classes

Outside of immersion, this would get my vote for the 2nd best option. The good thing about language classes is that you can take them anywhere in the world for any language.

There are no shortage of options here but I do have some suggestions when searching for the best one:

• Choose a native teacher. I will probably get some push back on this but I do think having a native teacher is best because they can combine language learning with culture. Book language vs. real language often differs.

• Opt for a small class or 1-1 lessons. You want to be in an environment where you can ask questions as they arise, which is easier in a small group or individual lessons.

• Ideally these classes are in-person. Again, I know I’ll get some push back here but I do have one big reason why in-person lessons are better than online ones. In-person it’s really hard to get distracted. You can’t be scrolling or multitasking, whereas online it’s pretty easy to get away with that.

If you’re interested in language classes but they need to be online, I suggest iTalki.

Apps

And that leaves us with language apps. I think apps are fab for learning vocabulary and basic sentence structure. If you’re just going on a trip or only need the basics, apps are the way to go. They’re cheaper or even free and should cover you there.

For someone starting out at 0 in a language, I’d recommend an app alongside language classes and/or immersion to give you vocab at a quicker rate.

I’ve tried a lot of apps over the years. Here are my thoughts on a few:

• Drops: Use the free version of this app for 5-minutes of vocab lessons a day. This is good for improving vocab but little else.

• Mondly: If you want to have a little bit more practice, this app is similar to Duolingo but has less silly prompts and more realistic phrases and sentences.

• Babbel: Babbel is similar to Mondly but also teaches cultural tidbits during the language lesson.

*These links are all affiliate ones, meaning I receive a small commission at no extra expense to you if you decide to purchase a subscription.

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Know that it’s hard and it takes a lot of time, patience, and frustration. Learning another language, especially to a level where you’re confident living in it, can be really hard. Especially as adults.

But know it’s possible.

Do your best not to compare yourselves to others (like that husband who just miraculously woke up speaking Italian one day) and stay in your own lane, at your own speed.

But, even if you’re not totally confident, make that phone call, start the conversation with the stranger at the dog park, and be OK with making mistakes and stumbling your way through it. Each time it’ll get just a little bit easier.