Is Moving Abroad Like in The Summer I Turned Pretty?

This is in response to Season 3, Episode 10/11 of The Summer I Turned Pretty and it's depiction of moving abroad. Save for later if you want to avoid spoilers.

I started The Summer I Turned Pretty a few months ago as a little background show while I worked around the house over a stormy weekend. Is it great TV? No. But is it entertaining enough to have me all the way through season 3? Yes. Just expect plenty of cringe moments along the way.

If you’re watching the newest season and haven’t yet watched episode 10, come back and read this later. While I’m not going to talk too much about the show, it will have spoilers as to where the characters are.

I know this series is based on a book but well, I didn’t read the books so all of what I’m saying here is coming solely from the TV side.

Insert picture to ensure you don’t read more than you want…

After the chaos of the wedding, Belly moves to France. Every time a show or movie depicts an eager American moving abroad, I pay extra close attention. After all, I’ve been that person to dive right in without any second thought.

More often than not the scenes are brushed over and glamorized. Visas are sorted out, work is fulfilling, and they either learn the local language extremely quickly or never even try (I’m looking at you Emily in Paris).

Things started off pretty hopeful: Belly buys a last minute flight thinking she can just hop right into a study abroad program without the correct visa or any forward planning.

Then turn realistic: The program essentially says, “wtf are you doing here?” and can’t magically open up a space, no matter how much she pouts.

With this turn of events, we all assume Belly will go back home to lick her wounds and dive headfirst into the most uncomfortable love triangle I’ve seen unfold on the screen.

But then she decides to stay. Episode 10 opens up 3 months later with her still in France.

I need answers. Yes, she mentions working under the table and yes, she mentions the hardships, both of which I’ll circle back around to, but here’s where things get glamorized for TV.

No matter how much you *want* to live in France, Americans (or anyone else from outside the EU) can’t just show up and stay. You’re given 3 months every 6 months to spend in the entire Schengen region (for many nationalities, including the US).

Some countries tend to turn a blind eye if you overstay your visa or ask you to pay a fee upon leaving the country; others allow you to do quick visa runs where you simply leave and come back, resetting your days at 0. The Schengen doesn’t work that way. Don’t let Belly’s ignorance rub off on you.

The fact that she was in the country for months before even thinking about how to stay and was able to sort out a long-stay visa without the need of going back to the US or queuing in endless lines at the immigration office, decidedly not realistic.

Although I suppose we can all agree that would make for some pretty boring TV.

Here’s what is realistic about their depiction of moving abroad:

• The homesickness

• The language struggles

• The cultural/food differences

• Not wanting to come home before you have something to prove

These are things all of us who have moved abroad have faced one way or another and honestly, I do think the show did a good job of highlighting these daily nuances of living abroad.

The scene where she practices what to say in the line at the bakery; or the story she tells of trying to buy laundry detergent but not knowing which is was at the store; or the fact you know the word but locals don’t understand your pronunciation of it.

All of these I felt in my soul. I’ve lived these moments every time I’ve moved to a new country and often more than just once. The smallest things often become the hardest when you transport yourself to a new country where you don’t know the language or the culture.

So many times you feel like, in the wise words of Belly, “such an idiot.”

They didn’t just harp on the negatives though. Life abroad is full of colors, full of highs and lows, nothing is ever only black and white.

The only piece of advice I’d suggest you take from Belly in the entire 3 seasons of the show is when met with doubts on how she could stay in France longer she replied, “I think if I wanted to make it work, I could.”

And really, I agree. Sometimes you have to work a job you hate, others you have to be on a visa that doesn’t align with your goals. But, more often than not, you can make it work if you want to.

It might take some wiggling and realistically you might have to set your eyes on a different country all together but really, moving abroad is just about finding the balance between how much effort you want to put in to make it happen + how flexible you’re willing to be (in location and job).

The biggest takeaway I found though was that moving to France showed her what she really wanted in life. She was no longer simply ticking boxes or waiting to be told what to do next. She had to figure life out on her own and with it, her own wants/needs/desires pushed their way to the forefront.

I can’t say who I would be if I never left over a decade ago. But I do feel pretty confident that I wouldn’t have spent this much uncomfortable time with myself to get a pretty good idea of who I am and what I want at my core.